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People aren't black - Susan Erica Squier

Artikelcode: 0084



Boek





Opvoeden kent geen kleur, meent Susan Erica Squier. Zij schreef -als ervaringsdeskundige- een boek over het opvoeden van een mixed kid in een land dat zo raciaal verdeeld is als de Verenigde Staten van Amerika.

 
Taal: Engels 
Pagina's: 67
Gewicht (gr): 200  
 

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Table of Contents


Chapter 1…………….People Aren't Black!
Chapter 2…………….We're All Colored!
Chapter 3…………….Our Race Is Human!
Chapter 4…...….……What the hell is being black?
                                      Parenting has no color!
Chapter 5……………What American Dream?
Chapter 6……………French, Cherokee Indian,                                                                                 Caucasian American
Chapter 7…………...Color Blind
Chapter 8…...............Both Sides Are Guilty!
Chapter 9…………...The Solution
Chapter 10………….Change Works
Chapter 11………….The Feedback
Work Cited



What The Hell Is Being Black?
Parenting Has No Color

                           Chapter 4                                                        


My Caucasian son, four at the time, asked me why people call his brother black when he looks brown.  How is anyone supposed to answer such a question? There is no good explanation. Slavery is over, and it has been for some time; it's not like it just ended five or ten years ago. People distinction should have been banned with slavery. Prejudice and segregation either ends or begins at the beginning of each and every life. When our children ask us these types of questions, we have the power to change the future. I refuse to teach my children that black is black, and brown is brown except on brown, tan and light brown people, because we call all those people black.  The majority of people today don't even resemble the color black. It was much easier for me to convince both of my children that my oldest son is light brown and Mulatto than it was to explain to them why people call him black.  It was equally easy to convince both of my boys that my skin is beige than it was to convince them that my skin is white as snow. It was easier because it makes absolutely no sense as to why the world calls anyone black. I refuse to teach my children prejudice by tradition. There is no reason why anyone, in today's society, should be called, or considered black.  Slavery ended; therefore there is no longer a "so called" need, or right to distinguish people by the tone of their skin; which is segregation.  We live in a country that prides itself on change.  Change is inevitable for growth.  Yet, we have failed to change the way we identify our own American people.  We are supposed to be one nation under God.  Either we are all Gods children, or we are not.

       The rules and love are not any different for my Mulatto son than they are for my Caucasian son.  Each, regardless of their skin pigmentation is their own person.  They both need my love, security, knowledge and consistency.  Raising well mannered, educated children also, has nothing to do with the color of their skin. 

       Parenting has no color.  I'm striving to raise two honest, likable, smart, happy, responsible men for our society.  Neither the love, nor the means are any different. So why, oh why, do people want to know who is going to teach my Mulatto son how to be black?  What the hell is being black?   Being black is not about listening to rap music, wearing sagging pants, having a thug attitude, and eating fried chicken with collard greens. And those who think other wise are really out of their minds.  To believe in this kind of mentality is saying that we don't live in a free country.  The only thing American citizens have to do in this country is obey the law.  Being anything is this world is about being you first.  A person's skin pigmentation doesn't decide what music they will like, or what foods they will like, or who they will befriend. We can't become our own individuals if we must live by these speculated concepts. People can only be truly happy when they're doing what makes them happy.  

       Skin tone in this country is no longer as simple as black and white. 

       On several occasions, I've heard people say that my "so called" black son should be around more people his own kind, and not just around "so called" white people.  Comments like these ignite me to no end.  He needs a sign that says "I'm white too." My sons' "kind" is human, and his skin tone is tan; he is not black. He's around human beings that genuinely love and care for him everyday, and most importantly, he's happy. Not everyone can say that, so he's definitely a few up on some children.  I'm not sure how this society ever expects to overcome the racial injustice in this country when we continue to act as if we want segregation.  If we want to live together as equals then we must stop acting like a brown skinned person is a sell out because he or she lives in a predominately lighter neighborhood, or listens to country music.  Stop saying he or she is around too many "so called" white people.  Stop calling a Caucasian who enjoys rap music a "so called" "wanna be." People are people.  If you don't want to be segregated against then don't segregate yourself, or those around you. This mentality has no rhyme or reason; it's just wrong. 

       My Mulatto son at the age of four was really into wearing cowboy boots.  He loved his boots. He was happy and just as care-free as any child should be. The happiness continued for a while; until his brown skinned, dead beat dad, told him that black kids don't wear cowboy boots.  The smile immediately left his face; he was so hurt.  I couldn't convince him that it didn't matter what he wore as long as he was happy.  I later found his new cowboy boots stuffed in his closet; never to be worn again. This kind of mentality hurts innocent children, and can potentially scar them for life. His biological father gave him a complex that he didn't deserve or need, and insinuated that being black is somehow different than the rest of the world. Up until that point in his life he didn't have any feelings of hatred, or bitterness; his biological father gave him that.  

       Five years later, I looked on as my Mulatto son watched sadly from a distance, while his Caucasian brother played happily in his new pair of cowboy boots.  My Mulatto son won't touch the boots now because he's too afraid that he'll get laughed at.  No law says you have to be anything, but your damn self.  My Mulatto son was styling in his cowboy boots.  There was absolutely no reason to take that happiness from him. This kind of behavior is called prejudice and segregation by tradition. Who and what you want to be is supposed to be totally up to each individual because supposedly, we live in a free country.  No matter what your skin tone; you can be a farmer, a bum, a writer, a cowboy, a millionaire, a rap star, even a movie star if you so choose.  Your inner self is what's ultimately going to make you happy, miserable, or somewhere in between.  Your neighbors, friends, family, and the world alike, have no real bearing on you or your happiness.  They don't pay your bills, clean your house, make your dinner, do your laundry or go to work for you.    No one, and I mean no one, will ever be able to please everyone.  Even if you had the ability to please every one; in the end you won't be happy unless your inner self is truly happy. Any one who is too busy pleasing everyone else is not ever going to have time to please their selves.

       Both of my children were taught the same alphabet, the same numbers and the same English language.  Changing both of their diapers was the same.  Keeping them warm, clean, fed and safe has nothing to do with their skin tone. Teaching them how to be kind to others has nothing to do with their skin color either.  I also taught both of them the same shapes and colors, again, without any regard for their skin pigmentation because parenting has no color.   However, society acts like I'm supposed to cook fried chicken with collard greens for my tan child and baked chicken with carrots for my apricot child.  It's just wrong; there are no two ways about it. Being a good, honest, kind and respectable person in society has absolutely nothing to do with skin color.  Most importantly, raising happy children has absolutely nothing to do with skin color; just unconditional love. So again I ask, what the hell is being black? And, why are our children, our future, being pushed into this dark place that society calls black? "Welcome to our world, you're dirty, evil, without color and gloomy; you are black." 

       We must get rid of these speculated identity clauses. These horrible definitions that describe our very own brothers and sisters lead to low self-esteem, anger and bitterness. Just about everyone contributes to this restrained segregation and prejudice; also known as discriminatory lying, in some way or another. 

       Since it seems to be, so acceptable to say that we must teach our brown and tan children how to be black then why aren't we teaching other skin tones their role too?  Brown skinned people are black and must eat collard greens with fried chicken; the Irish must eat corn beef and cabbage; the Italian must eat spaghetti and be familiar with the mob; Puerto Ricans must eat rice with beans and speak Spanish; and the Caucasian must learn from a young age that they can't jump or dance.  

       Parenting should be about good human beings wanting to raise better human beings; who are honest, reliable, well-mannered happy people.  Love is unconditional; love is not teaching bitterness and hatred. 

       Many people in our town know my Mulatto son; which makes him feel great and included. He knows that he's apart of his community.  I believe I've done well for my kids thus far; especially given my starting point. But, you wouldn't believe the disapproval that I get from society as a whole.  To some people it's as if I'm neglecting my Mulatto child because he's in a great neighborhood that happens to be predominately Caucasian. We have next to no crime, no murders, no drive by's, and not many worries.  My children can just be children here in the country.  My children experience things here that I could have only dream of experiencing at their age.  I grew up in subsidized housing where there weren't any gardens, wildlife or privacy.  We had community lawns and playgrounds where twenty plus kids played daily. I grew up thinking that farm and country life was only for the rich. Country life is wholesome and exciting for all children of all shades, shapes and sizes. Wholesome and exciting have nothing to do with skin pigmentation. It's much better for people to experience life, and nature than horror, pain and poverty. But, according to today's' society my son's supposed to be in the middle of a city where the brown Americans are more dominant, so that someone can teach him how to be black.  This makes absolutely no sense, and it's outrageously unfair to our children. Society's actions say that we want to be separated. Separating human beings was wrong then, and it's even more wrong now. We must think outside of the "crayon" box. 















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